1 Year Ago..

Bucket List: Travel the world solo-CHECK 

1 year ago to this day I was boarding a plane from Mexico making my way home. I can still feel the overwhelming emotions I felt that day. I was filled with excitement, fear, contentment, sadness and happiness all at the same time. I stepped into the Minneapolis airport, with my same tiny backpack and a pile of checks off my never-ending bucket list.

I cried. I cried that 15 months on the road, alone, was over. I cried because I was so full of gratitude for the lessons I learned and experiences I had. I cried because I was so excited to see my family, boyfriend and friends. I cried because I did it! I accomplished the biggest and longest dream I have ever had. The best gift I have ever given myself!

Before and after the big adventure 🙂

It’s been a year since I’ve really written anything but I’m continuing to experience life through my never-ending bucket list wherever I am in the world. So, today I thought it would be a great to day to share some thoughts about what I learned and worked through while on the road and especially the ones that have continued to enrich my life today and always will.

Life is busy. It just is and that’s ok. Not to long after I returned home a year ago, I got right back to working two jobs, I proposed to my boyfriend, we bought a house and are planning a wedding! And most likely starting a family sometime this year too 🙂 That doesn’t leave me much time to spend most of the day simply thinking, journaling, doing yoga, exploring, people watching, etc. as I had while I was traveling.

It was a bit of a “culture shock,” coming back to a world where my time feels constantly utilized, days are rushed, always driving in the car and needing to buy something. But, it’s also not a bad thing! I’m extremely grateful for all the experiences that I’ve already had since being home and all those that are to come. Yes, life is busy but it’s ok because I’m busy working towards new bucket list items, starting new and exciting chapters and creating a happy life.

Cruisin’ on top in the Philippines

Balance and grounding are essential. This was one of the most important aspects of life that was hard for me, and something I’m still working on, because I tend to be an all-or-nothing type of person. I either worked a lot and left no time for anything else or I didn’t feel like working much. I either ate junk and didn’t care or didn’t allow myself to eat any “unhealthy” foods. I either studied 10 hours for a test or didn’t really study at all. I either got drunk or didn’t drink at all (I most likely won’t balance that one out, which is why I’m still sober today!) So, balance is something I have really had to work on.

I now make a conscious decision to balance all aspects of life (besides the drinking). I make sure to take time to ground and connect myself internally and externally because I believe that both balance and grounding need each other. I may not have as much time as before, but it’s the little things that make a big difference. I make sure I have some alone time in the mornings to think, journal, read, meditate or do yoga/exercise-to ground myself internally and to remember what’s important to me. I take extra time to make foods that make me feel good but I eat cake and ice cream when I want it-and I enjoy it! When I’m having an off day or feeling overwhelmed, I take time to stop, make a vision board, write a gratitude list or walk around the yard barefoot so that I can connect to the outside world. I call a friend to vent whatever is on my mind instead of holding it in because I want to act like everything is fine. I take days off of work to spend time with loved ones so I no longer miss out on special memories.

These strong connections remind me who I am as a person and what is important in my life. Balancing life keeps me grateful, sane and content to accept whatever life has to offer.

Vietnam kayaking

Learning to listen. To REALLY listen to myself and others around me without judgement or over thinking has been very beneficial in my life. We deserve it to ourselves to rest or spend a day not doing anything if our minds and bodies are telling us we are exhausted or unbalanced. Being true to ourselves comes from really listening to what we want and not being afraid of it. Maybe it’s following a dream you can’t stop thinking about or taking some alone time or doing something on your bucket list. Go for it! Your mind and body are trying to tell you something so listen. This is another reason balance and grounding are so important..so we can take the time to listen, discover and reflect on our own inner desires, hopes, dreams and even fears that may be holding us back.

We can also learn so much from other people when we really listen. I have learned so much from other people’s’ stories, perspectives and advice. Everyone has a life story that is unique in its own way. We can all learn from each other if our minds are open. Maybe we can even relate to something someone else went through or is going through. I have also found that my connections with people are much deeper when I really listen to what they have to say and put aside judgements or my urges to step in and say something right away.

Quiet time in Thailand

Let that shit go. This too shall pass. No big deal. This is one of my favorites! It seems like such a simple concept but it has taken me pretty much my whole life to finally say I can let shit go. And by shit I mean worries, doubts, mistakes, societal pressures, material things, etc. All the things that have caused me excessive anxiety, worry and fear for most of my life.

Sure, I still have things that I have trouble getting over and things will always pop up here and there, but I’m working through them and I know eventually my sadness, guilt, anger or whatever it is, will pass. Because everything passes and thank god for that. What needs to stay in our lives will, and whatever doesn’t will eventually move on. Trust the journey 🙂

Maybe it’s just something that happens when one turns 30 years old, but for me, stepping into a new decade with confidence and self-love, trust and acceptance, has been so empowering. I really don’t care if people judge me or don’t agree with how I live my life. I don’t care that I don’t live in a huge house or have a high-paying, well-respected job or drive a fancy car. I really don’t because I personally don’t care about those things or feel like I need them. I am extremely happy having what MY heart desires and for me that means letting a lot of unnecessary material shit go too. Of course I have, like and need material things (I could probably get rid of the hundreds of jars and containers I’m obsessed with), and I’m not judging anyone who strives for “bigger and better” things. It’s just that, what makes me “spark” or feel accomplished on the inside, may not be the same for someone else and that’s ok. Personally I feel happy when life is simple and my days are full of laughter and love. When I have money to spend on experiences and time to relax with my loved ones. Happiness to me is being true to who I am!

Didn’t make it to the top of Mt. Rinjani in Indonesia. No big deal..still amazing!

Perfectionism isn’t really a thing. Where did this word actually come from? What does it even mean? I was always the type of person who strived to be perfect and hated myself for never being able to get there. Well hmmm..maybe because it actually doesn’t make any sense!! Again, another simple concept but we self-sabotage ourselves with these ridiculous thought processes.

Yes, we all want to strive to do our best and that’s great, but sometimes maybe we set the standard way too high and forget about how awesome it is that we have accomplished what we have. I used to barely speak Spanish because I couldn’t speak it perfectly. When I was younger I wore long sleeves and jeans all summer because my body wasn’t perfect. I hated the fact that I got a B+ on a test because it wasn’t an A+. Nothing I ever did was enough because it wasn’t perfect. I never saw the good in anything I did. Well, today I’m ok with whatever I do as long as I’m doing my best. And actually, this has helped clear my head, ease my anxiety and become more productive overall.

I didn’t start this blog for the longest time because I just didn’t want to fail and I wanted it to be perfect. Again, I’m not sure what that even meant at the time. But, here I am writing when I have time and sharing what I can. I’m not the best writer and it would be nice to have a better vocabulary to express myself the way I see it in my mind. It’s already way too long (thank you if your still reading!) and I have many ideas for it that I still haven’t done. But, right now it is what it is so whatever. No big deal. I write from the heart and it makes me feel good so that’s what matters to me. I’m proud to have even started something that scared me and if I’m suppose to do more with it, then that time will come. So, wherever you are in life at this moment, be proud of yourself because you rock!

Rainy day in Japan

Words are powerful. Yup, they really are. On a physical level too. I started the practice of gratitude journaling, positive affirmations and making visions boards while I was traveling in hopes that it would help me get through some tough issues I was working through. It is incredible how powerful these practices are for moving through difficult times and manifesting the life you want.

Some days I find myself complaining about small things or feeling really negative about everything. Again, feeling really unbalanced. I know deep down that’s not who I am as a person, so that’s a sign I need to step back and recharge.

Making a gratitude list is powerful because it refocuses our thoughts into the positive aspects of life instead of the negative-helping to calm anxieties and worries.

Positive affirmations are also great for creating a reminder to put out positive thoughts and actions, therefore receiving positivity back. Do you ever notice if you start your day off negative and your mind is not in a good place, everything that day seems to be wrong? Next time you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, repeat a few simple positive affirmations and pay attention how your day ends up. Maybe even express positivity to those around you and see how that affects the overall environment.

Vision boards are incredible for manifesting hopes and dreams. Or even seeing a clear visual of goals you would like to work towards. And if some of those hopes, dreams and goals fade down the road, no big deal. Let it go and keep moving forward.

Mexico 🙂

Happiness is right here. It always has been and always will be. I have always been told that no person or thing can truly you make you happy. I suppose I believed it but I never really felt it. Until I did my yoga training in India where I realized that if I can feel happy with just myself and my mat, then why can’t I feel like off the mat? There was no one or anything else on the mat with me to help me deal with the emotions I was feelings. Just me. I was responsible and held accountable for my owns fears, sadness and anger.  And eventually something shifted and I was overcome with true, genuine happiness. All by myself!

I spent many many days alone in foreign countries with not much else than my tiny backpack. I honestly love traveling alone and having alone time but it’s not always rainbows and butterflies. Some days I never talked to anyone. There were many days I missed my boyfriend and family so deeply I got sick. Some days I didn’t know what I was doing in life. Somedays I wanted to give up because I was so exhausted of mentally being stuck in the past. But I was alone, and that’s exactly what I needed. Because now I have an incredible amount of confidence, empowerment, strength and compassion for life and I know it’s genuine because it came from me! Of course, people and our situations can add immense joy to our life, but if you can’t find that true happiness deep down in yourself first, I believe it’s very hard to truly enjoy and accept what others have to offer you. Happiness is already there, you just have to relax and trust.

Hiking in Nepal

Well, thank you for reading this far! These were some of the main life lessons I learned while traveling and that I still continue to work on. Life is really an amazing thing! Trust the journey and you will be where you need to be. For now, I’m revamping my bucket list and will always be checking off adventures 🙂 And I sure am happy to be home!

Balloons over Bagan, Myanmar

What are some of your favorite life lessons? How did they change your life? 

 

 

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